Monday, August 27, 2012


These last weeks there have been quite some 
discussions in ND circles on the internet 
about teachers charging money
for satsangs and retreats.
I was wondering why we make such an issue out of it. 

When a robber on the street assaults you, he might say: 
‘Your money or your life.’

Someone who gives satsangs has even more to say to that:
‘Your money and your life.’  

If one is willingly going to satsang knowing fully 
well what is at stake:  your life  
( after all you are asked to see through the illusion of 
the person you believe yourself to be )   
and you are willingly sacrificing this life,   
what is the big deal of a little money next to that.
It pales in comparison to what you are asked to give up.

Actually a person going to satsang 
is coming for his/her own death.
If you think about it is crazy.  
Who wants that?
Really, a sane person would stay away 
from Nonduality, from satsangs.   
You are asked to give up everything.

The person will never get This.
The person has to die....  
Its only through Grace that 
something of a shift takes place. 
And after the shift happens it leaves 
one disoriented, empty and bewildered.
If you want my advice: 
stay away from Nonduality and teachers. 

Keep your money and run.
Run for your life...    ;-)

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Shift happens

Its strange to write about this.
It feels impossible to put in words,  
as it is so subtle
that one is not sure if it is true,  
or one just imagines everything.

Since some days after intense questioning something shifted.

Before there was the awareness 
of not being a person,
but somehow it still felt localized.

 ( Like the felt sense of a formless something
    floating in spacious awareness.)

This 'new' thing is just Nothing at all, 
so if i am not kept busy, or going on into habits, 
i just stare into space.

Sitting in front of a plate of food,  
hardly knowing what to do with it,
like everything stops.

Nothing makes sense,  it is dream like.
Looking at something and it feels you fall into it.
Dissolving into what is.
It is a disorienting 
and makes one a bit dizzy at times.

Yesterday morning on waking up 
going for a walk.

Discovering that the felt sense of the body had disappeared.
The way the body was perceived before in the way 
the muscles were holding the posture was gone.
No felt difference with the surroundings.

Also the vitality has changed.
A walk would be with some sense of purpose and
going somewhere,  some energy with which to do this.
Now walking goes slower with no purpose.  
Everything slowed down.
And at times presence stops everything.

But then also life just goes on,  
picks up the person and moves it 
around in a reasonable fashion.
And when i am with people, 
normal responding is going on.

At times the  mind comes in and 
chatters and jabbers away about it all.
Trying in vain to make sense of it. 

And of course in the end 
Nothing happens anyway ;-).

Saturday, August 18, 2012


Everything is absolutely relative,
Except the Absolute itself of course.
And as the Absolute is not a thing
and cannot be objectified,
even that statement is false.
In the end, ( and in the beginning as well )
one is lost for words...

And... if the Absolute is all there is,
it includes everything and definitely
anything relative
or relevant, 
or irrelevant
or trivial
or totally outlandish
or anything invented,
thought about,
or otherwise.

And anyway its all the Absolute
doing everything
as everything
as there is nothing else
apart from This.

All the discarded
and unwanted things, 
we prefer not to see, 
to look away from.
All the ugly sights and sites,  
Never ever anything outside
of what is.
But on the other side..

All things beautiful and marvelous
just as well.



Blank  blank  zero
Nothing is here.

Shift happens
What it is?

How can one say anything about nothingness.?
Let alone about degrees of nothingness?

There are no words to describe a featureless 'state'.

As if from a formless something 
floating in spacious awareness
one becomes immersed in 
the continuity in which all happens.

The substratum.
The beyond of it all.

Everything disappears in This.

Immersed in the deep silence of reality.
                                   - Nisargadatta Maharaj

Names and shapes

In reality only the Ultimate is.  The rest
is a matter of name and form.  And as long
as you cling to the idea that only what has
name and shape exists, the Supreme will
appear to you non-existing.  When you
understand that names and shapes are
hollow shells without any content whatsoever,
and what is real is nameless and formless,
pure energy of life and light of consciousness,
you will be at peace - immersed in the deep
silence of reality.
               - Nisargadatta Maharaj

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Breakfast on the terrace

Early Sunday morning
Breakfast on the terrace

The piano of the neighbor
chicken cackle
babblers babble

The taste of coffee
and the warmth of it reaching the stomach

One butterfly chases another,  dancing,
while they soar and tumble

Wind sways the branches of the trees around the house

A magpie robin sings for joy

A gentle peace lies on the land

A small insect flies around my head, and lands on my nose.
In a split second it is known from its flight pattern that it is not
a musquitoe but a tiny bee.
This is not the mind operative labeling.
It is knowing, immediate recognizing what it is.

The mind is too slow.  It observes, deducts, thinks about it
and comes to a conclusion after the fact.

Seeing knowing is immediate.
It is Self seeing itself as a myriad of things.
Knowledge through identity.
Seeing-Knowing is without interpretation.

Adyashanti says somewhere something like, (in my words):

Unenlightenment means seeing things which are not real.
The ideas we have about things, not the things in themselves.  
This includes all kinds of unexamined beliefs and concepts.

Enlightenment is just seeing things as they are.
Simply seeing going on,
without a someone doing it .

This open perspective.
There you are.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

The agony and the ecstasy

Does one ever know anything?

A passing mood  
an irritation 
a moments joy.

Does one know why it appeared the way it did?
A sadness,  
a depression.
Why did it jump from nowhere 
and made itself known?

The mind will come up with some clever answers.
And some of them might sound reasonable:

'because of this fellow doing this or that'

'because i just won the jack pot'

But does one ever really know?

This morning overwhelmed by heavy feelings,  
which weigh on the way one perceives the world.   
Usually labelled depression.
And why?


'sitting with a friend, who after an accident is brain damaged 
and who is struggling to come out of his confines'?

'menopausal fluctuations sending the mood into the pits' ?

'part of  integration happening,  some parts of the body mind set    up still reluctantly giving up their hold.  
Dreading the emptiness.'?

'a natural movement like the tides in the ocean, 
moving from ecstasy to agony,  from up to down.  
The breathing in and out by existence through this form.'?

Take your pick.  

And in the end what difference does it make?

And who is there to care.?

Sitting with this feeling,  
this delicacy thrown at one,
with all the love and compassion,
it is just Love embracing Itself.

Life happening...

Saturday, August 4, 2012


Dance,  dance the dance of life,
Swing, rock, rap.
Disappear in the music.

Hop on the train.
Sit at a station for a while,  
watch life go by.
Then hop on to the next.
Always moving, always Here.

A masserati on winding roads.

Diving with hang gliders from mountain tops.
Infinite as sky.

Who knows what life brings?
Who knows what you are meant to do?

Climb with heavy tread 
on stony paths the steep slopes.
Breathing deep,  
muscles aching.
Admire and drink in the view from the top.

Did you figure it out already?
What is your next move going to be?
Do you know?

Explore the jungle,
Nature overtaking you with 
its scents, sights and sounds.
Dissolving into the foliage.

Do you have your strategies in place?
Is your insurance up to date? 

Meanwhile dance with whatever comes your way.
Twist your legs, 
swing your hips.

Life is happening anyway anyhow.

You might as well..

The great unknown

Nothing is certain in this relative world.
Except the fact that everything comes and goes.

All what we are holding on to as mine:

my family, my friendships, my home, 
my possessions, my work, my character, 
my body, my abilities, my ego, my progress, 
my spiritual path, my surrender, my concepts, 
my problems, my ideas,  my childhood traumas,
my beliefs.............

the 'certainties' which are giving stability to our lives,
are always subject to change, 
and can be taken away at a moments notice.

One tsunami and all is swept away.
One accident and our lives are in turmoil.
One hemorrhage and the you you think yourself to be
has changed beyond recognition.

Nothing will change this fact.
The great unknown is the base of our existence.
Is what we are.

When it dawns on us that in the relative world we will
never find the permanency we are searching for,
we might be ready for a new adventure.
Our next quest... :
The certainty of the absolute in which all takes place.

Is there any way to get to This?

Who is asking?

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

It seems to me...

It seems to me...
that all there is
is Oneness 
or That
whatever one wants to call IT.

In this and as this 
all and everything comes into existence and 
goes out of it.

Intelligent energy patterning itself 
in a billion different ways.

Life forms, 
animate and inanimate.

And never ever is there in those lifeforms 
the sense of being separate.
Of having LOST IT.

As there is no one contemplating 
that they could possibly be out of It.

Until the human monkey comes onto the scene
and contracts into a individual 
which believes itself separate.

(The cramping up, 
 the resistance is what makes us feel separate.)

Then some of the contractions ( us ) get the urge
to seek wholeness, enlightenment.

It, the contracted human monkey, 
also thinks itself superior.

And thinks that because it searches for enlightenment,
the most noble of all endeavors, 
that the lifeforms who cannot reason and reflect are 
necessarily incapable of realizing
this most sought after ‘state’.

Not comprehending that animals and plants,
never have cramped up in the first place,
never have fallen out of paradise,
and have never left the place we are longing for.

We are all That, Oneness patterning as dogs, lions,
trees, rocks, humans etc. unknowingly.

Life forms patterning as humans 
when the contraction has fallen away 
are That aware of Itself knowingly.